blogging revisited

So I am revisiting the art of blogging. I suddenly feel like I have a lot to say...perhaps to no one but myself. So write I will.

The last couple of years have brought intense pain and also great joy...sometimes simultaneously. I lost my mom and several other people with whom I was close. I have dealt with health problems I knew about and health problems that have only recently been diagnosed. I injured myself severely, and most recently, had surgery to fix this. I lost a job and got a new job. If you plug all of these things in the stress index screen, technically, I should be dead. But I'm not, and that makes me very happy.

I am learning to rely on other people to help me, as right now I cannot even get to the bathroom without a wheelchair and someone to help me transfer. I have a big, black boot cast on each foot and sometimes I also have support straps on my forearms. I am the epitome of fashion right now. And I am very grateful that I have a lot of skirts.

I have lost my faith in God and found it again. My new job has been wonderful and has re-affirmed my faith in humanity. My support system has expanded in some ways and drastically shrunk in others. When my mom died, my dad chose a new wife, and so I chose a new mom. Mama Jeanie is wonderful and I am so glad that I am the 12th child she and her husband Bill adopted. I stopped attending the church I had attended for 8 years, and lost that community of friends. I did start attending a new church, and I like this church so much.

I have learned a lot about myself...about why I feel so overwhelmed sometimes. And because of this, I am less overwhelmed. Although sometimes I am lonely, I am okay and strive nearly every day to be more okay.

I believe that I will struggle somewhat as I continue to heal from my injuries and surgery. And so, I will write. If it helps one person, and that person just happens to be me it will be worth it.

Peace be with you...and with me too.